The Power of Kindness

I am an author and a speaker, a minister of a dynamic congregation in New York City.

In other words, my life revolves around people, and people are very interesting creatures. They can be friendly or standoffish, impatient, angry, generous, compassionate, funny. Yet each and every one of us has at our disposal one of the greatest powers on earth—kindness.

Years ago I holed up for 10 days at an inn in the Shenandoah Valley to do some writing. I was glad to be away from the phone, the long meetings, the countless appointments. Nothing to do but finish my book.

Sunday morning I slid into a back pew at the town church. People around me greeted one another and shared bits of local news. All of a sudden I felt lonely being so far from my friends in New York. The feeling persisted through the service. At the end, as I stood up to put on my overcoat, I felt a tap on my shoulder.

I turned around. An elderly lady in her Sunday best. "You're a visitor here," she said. "I'm very glad you came."

All these years later I can't remember what the choir sang or what the minister preached. The only thing I recall is that woman's kindness to me. A few simple words, but they made me feel better. That's the power of kindness. Just a touch of it can change everything.

Kindness Is Contagious
Mom was right. Kindness begets kindness. We've all been trapped in line at the supermarket or the bank. It doesn't take long for people to get out-of-sorts, to feel mistreated. A glare from the clerk or teller, a surly comment from a customer, and the tension only mounts.

Yet how many times have you seen a kind word or thoughtful gesture defuse that tension in an instant? I have. In fact, it's usually the only thing that will work. Once I witnessed a store manager calm an irate customer by simply pulling over a chair for her to sit down.

Kindness Can Change a Life.
My senior year in high school I worked very hard and took some really tough courses. Then I waited for the administration to post the honor roll, sure that I would be on it. But I wasn't. I was devastated.

Maybe I wasn't that smart after all. Maybe I didn't even deserve to go to college. My political science teacher, Mr. Walsh, stopped me in the hallway.

"Arthur," Mr. Walsh said, "I'm sure there's some mistake. You should be on that honor roll."

There had been no mistake. My grades just weren't good enough.

"Well," he said, "in my estimation, you belong there."

That was the encouragement I needed. Just a few kind words. It couldn't have taken more than a minute. Mr. Walsh believed I was good enough to be on the honor roll and that thought stayed with me through college and beyond.