Loss

"I have sometimes thought of the final cause of dogs having such short lives and I am quite satisfied it is in compassion to the human race; for if we suffer so much in losing a dog after an acquaintance of ten or twelve years, what would it be if they were to live double that time?"—Sir Walter Scott

Most of us grieve deeply at the loss of a pet. Veterinarian, Dr. Hines, says “For some of us, this is a very private thing. And some of us question if it is the right thing to do. It is. It doesn't matter if the pet was a mouse or a Mastiff—grief is independent of size. Some animals are lost due to accidents when they are young and in good health while others die after a prolonged illness. Whatever the case, grief and sadness are normal responses to loss.”

Because we all experience loss in some form or other, I think it helps to hear about how others go through this sad time. I’d like to share Bonnie Hart’s story about her little brown-eyed Jake.

God shows his love in many ways throughout our lifetime. For me one of these special gifts was Jake. He saw me through divorce, a bad car accident, job loss, to name just a few. I thank God for the great gift of Jake. My memories are many and rich. His beautiful, expressive brown eyes giving and receiving love. Recalling how Jake knew when I was upset and gave me comfort; curling up in the small of my back as we slept. Jake was always there.

That fateful day at the vet’s office as I had to say goodbye to Jake I felt my heart would break. So I sang "Amazing Grace" and "Just As I Am With One Plea." Then I recited The Lord’s Prayer. This was my private funeral service for little Jake.

God reminded me that Jake was now playing with the other dogs in Heaven. I knew his pain was gone and this knowledge gave me peace.—Bonnie L. Hart; Kaukauna, WI

In my 30 years of rescuing dogs I’ve learned something about the process of grieving.

Here are some suggestions to help during this troubling time:

•    Give yourself permission to grieve
•    Recognize how much your pet meant to you
•    Visit his or her favorite spot and remember the times of wonder and joy
•    Get lots of rest; take care of yourself
•    Be patient. This is not easy or quick. You will have sad grief-filled moments, but these too shall pass and you will smile again.
•    Don’t be afraid to talk to friends and family. As Shakespeare said, “Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er frought heart and bids it break.”

Photo: Little Jake; “My little dog, a heartbeat at my feet”—Edith Wharton

Sharon Azar is an assistant to the editorial staff at GUIDEPOSTS. In her spare time, she rescues dogs and does portraits of furry, feathered and scaled companion animals. She lives in Brooklyn, NY.

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