Let Go and Say Yes

Today is my 45th birthday (I’m writing this on Friday, June 26th) and I can’t help but notice the difference between celebrating 45 and 40.

For my 40th birthday, I rented a stretch limo and whooped it up with my 13 closest friends. We went out to dinner and then dancing, and it was a blast.

This year the celebration will involve a pedicure and going out to dinner with friends. That’s about as wild as I want it this time. And while I may no longer be the party girl I once was, I am still determined to embrace and celebrate my age, however large the numbers become.

Maybe that’s easier said than done now, and will get harder as the calendar pages flip by. I understand the desire to let a birthday just slip by unnoticed so we don’t have to think about everything that goes with it.

Last month I bought my first pair of reading glasses. Like many of my girlfriends, I put it off as long as I could, but my love of reading outweighed vanity and denial on this one. I had no idea how to buy them. Luckily I found a three-pack at the store with a guide on the back of the package.

“If you can’t read this line, you need this strength” it said. Well, if you can’t read it, how do you know which one to get? Okay, I did feel some small amount of pride I could still read ALL the lines of text—I bought a pack with a 1.50 level strength. But I’m sure that will change. Who cares, I’m just happy I can read in bed again.

In The Secret of Letting Go, author Guy Finley talks about how resisting reality is the cause of most unhappiness. We may not be thrilled about something, but resisting it just makes it that much harder. Better to accept it, and use the energy for something much more enjoyable. We sure can’t change our date of birth.

I have several friends who chose not to have any big celebrations for their 40th birthdays, which is just fine, it’s their life and their choice. But one refused to let any of us acknowledge her milestone birthday, in any way—no cards, no presents, not even a birthday phone call. That was both sad and frustrating.

I understood it—I was twice divorced and childless on my 40th birthday, which was never my plan. But it was reality. And life is the biggest gift of all.

I refuse to resist my age, whatever it is. Instead, I’m going to embrace it and say yes to it. Aging may have its drawbacks, but it sure has a lot of benefits.

The one feeling I have that surprises me most about aging is the relief I feel. Talk about letting go! There is so much freedom in letting go of things that just aren’t as important as they once were. Caring about my looks is the first, then worrying what other people think, and doing anything that doesn’t make me happy.

I have so much to be grateful for—I live in a beautiful place, I get to do work I love, I have many close family members and friends who love and care for me, and show it (not to mention two small dogs who give me daily doses of pure joy). I’m healthy, blessed in so many ways, and full of excitement and hope for the future. God has wonderful plans for my life, and I just need to stay in the flow.

I love where I am in my life at the age of 45. I love the confidence I have, the security of knowing who I am and what I want. And I love that I know how to be happy, and each year I get better at learning how to T.R.U.S.T. (To Rely Unto Spirit Totally). 

It’s a few years away, but I’m going to plan something REALLY spectacular for my 50th birthday. In fact, I’m looking forward to it. Who knows, I may even get another limo. However I celebrate it, I’m just going to let go and say YES!

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